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We live in a society where it’s easy to define ourselves. There are opportunities to open many kinds of doors. What counts is walking through the right entrances. So what should you focus on? That thing you focus on will be the source of your strength and momentum that helps you to define yourself.
The door to accomplishment is open by the key known as concentration. If you succeed at developing your focus, you can strike successfully in the right place until you’ve fulfilled your purpose. With an accomplished focus, chase after that one thing. Aim for one target. Put everything you’ve got into making your goal a successful one. Do not make these four biggest mistakes people make when setting goals and defining themselves.
Listening to Everyone
Everyone has an opinion, not everyone will understand what your goals are. Every person has their own experiences, outlooks, and biases. If your goal was to cater to the way every person sees the world, it’s either a goal that needs many hands on deck or something impossible that may drive you to a nervous breakdown.
Another issue with listening to everyone’s advice is that trusting what everyone says will cause you to question who is right and who is wrong. The only way to combat this is to use your own intuition, experience, and maybe even your own biases and then put the loudest voices to the test.
Most of the time, 20% of people will love what you’re striving for while 80% will temporarily love your goal or eventually hate it. To keep the 20% pleased should be the goal. It may require you to look for some mentors and only share future ideas with them. These few people may come through and help you succeed where you’re most likely to fail.
Trying to Please Everyone
You cannot please everyone.
I, (Aaron), was a musician who wanted to reach everybody with the songs I composed. I tried changing every aspect of my sound but as a result, nobody took my music seriously. They had no idea who my musical persona actually was. Once I decided what kind of a musician I wanted to be, my fan-base started to slowly grow.
You need to know who your tribe is. Who do you connect with the most? What do they like that you like? What have you done to please them? What do they need from you that you can provide to make them happy? If it is easy to answer these questions, you are well on your way to If you try to please the people who don’t share in your goal, the process of reaching the goal will be slower or end in failure.
Listening to No One
We understand this a lot. We’re broke and afraid to pay for peoples’ financial advice because it costs money. We’re afraid to look foolish if we admit that we need a ride to a gathering so we take the bus only to find ourselves refilling our transit cards with e-cash.
It’s okay for you to be scared of testing another person’s advice they give you. The truth is that you aren’t alone. If you feel you don’t deserve help, stop lying to yourself. People want to help. People want to see you succeed. Don’t dismiss the stepping stone just because a river has waves of fear and doubt. Don’t be afraid to see your goal from another person’s eyes. You may find the way if you envision what they’re saying.
Setting Goals Only For Yourself
If all you can ask is “What’s in it for me?”, you are a sad lonely person. You may need to change your mindset or may even need professional help. This is a big problem. Many times, narcissism or a victim mindset is what needs to be dealt with. The world doesn’t owe you your goal. You’re not a ruler or a leader unless you’re willing to serve other people. With that kind of an attitude, no one will want to help you achieve your goals and dreams. This kind of outlook results in a negative lifestyle that is destructive to others and especially to YOU both physically and emotionally. Being full of yourself will leave you empty later in life.
Most dreamers live separated from the longings of their heart and the results that they need. It takes commitment and strength to develop abilities for the results of that one common goal or purpose. You can develop those abilities by leading your desires, not ignoring them. As a result, your actions, your moods, your tone of voice, the words you choose to speak, and the way you dress will let people know you mean business. They’ll know you have a reason to live.
Many people can’t see the future. A lot more need glasses in the present. That’s because they are not living out their purpose in life. They may say they have a purpose but its run by someone else. It may even be run by something else. Don’t live a life without knowing your purpose. Instead, find out who you really are, be content with the life you’re living now, and accept what you can’t change. Most important of all, be wise enough to know the difference between where you are and where you should be. It’s up to you to figure that out.
You can also find other tips from a great book we’re reading called Fit for the Love of It by Dr. Uche Odiatu and Kary Odiatu. You get access to the book immediately after ordering it on Amazon for your tablet or Kindle book reader (paperback copies may be limited). This book will change the way you apply new habits to your health, mental improvement, and nutrition.